HIV Ain’t Got No Chill: Protecting Yourself On The DL Or Out & Proud

November 15, 2024

HIV Does Not Care If You’re On The DL

Some same-sex couples are out and proud, comfortably moving through society and having fulfilling relationships. However, this is not the case for everyone. A recent study shows that 83% of individuals who identify as gay, lesbian, or bisexual prefer to keep this status private. There may be several reasons why couples choose to remain in the closet, including societal or family reasons. Whether open or private, the risk of human immunodeficiency virus (HIV) still remains. HIV does not care and can be easily transmitted in certain physical relationships. There are some critical steps individuals or couples should take to remain healthy and happy.

Why you are especially at risk

Same-sex or bisexual individuals or couples, especially men who have sex with men (MSM), are at risk of contracting HIV. People who are private have additional challenges that increase the risk of contracting HIV. These groups may not seek out free or inexpensive services due to fear of judgment. There are also high-risk behaviors that are common in these groups. People who aren’t open to compromise with partners out of fear of discovery or exposure. Some are less likely to discuss concerns like condom use or sexually transmitted infection (STI) testing. Stigma and discrimination can also lead some closeted individuals to engage in higher-risk sexual behaviors to fit in or avoid suspicion. With all these hurdles, there are still ways to remain safe.

Protect yourself with open communication

Whether open and proud or private and closeted, the foundation is communication. Speak with a trusted partner about any concerns surrounding HIV. Place boundaries around intimacy, HIV testing, and being open about safety. Even people who are closeted need support and resources to feel comfortable about these conversations. Consider joining discreet online LGBTQ+ support groups and anonymous resources for emotional support and a sense of community. These groups can provide the confidence to speak openly with current and future sexual partners about HIV prevention.

Protect yourself with testing

HIV testing is the best way to consistently stay on track of sexual health, especially in same-sex relationships. There are different types of HIV testing available, such as at-home tests, which can bring an added degree of privacy. For those who need medical support, consider a doctor who is LGBTQ+ competent and understands the challenges of being closeted. These doctors can provide testing and additional resources discreetly and with empathy. When testing is unavailable, continue with safe sex practices, such as condom use.

Protect yourself with PrEP

Pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP) is an excellent way to stay protected from HIV infection. This innovative medication prevents HIV from establishing a foothold in the body. When taken daily, studies show PrEP can prevent HIV infection by at least 95%. Some closeted individuals may be in high-risk situations, such as anonymous sex or unprotected sex with multiple partners. PrEP can provide peace of mind in these complicated relationships. Although a prescription is required, there are numerous resources and telehealth services that can supply PrEP at a minimal cost.

Stay HIV-safe in or out of the closet

Even with a growing acceptance of the LGBTQ+ community, there is still a large contingent on the down low. Those out and proud may feel empowered to take sexual health seriously. Some people who are closeted may struggle to get help due to the many obstacles in the way. Despite these challenges, there are many resources, including testing and PrEP, that can help with sexual health and HIV prevention.

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